Kids Table At Thanksgiving?

As I begin to think about the turkey and dressing, I began to wonder about the number of families who really do prefer pumpkin over sweet potato pie and how many have a designated kids’ tables their Thanksgiving gatherings.

The Kids Table

The kids table is where the children are assigned to eat. Usually, the linens, best china, silverware, and stemware are absent. The place setting are paper, plastic, and styrofoam.

The existence of the Kids’ tables may be justified as children are developing their small motor skills. During that development time, they are better at handling styrofoam cups as opposed to the waterford steamware. But in many situations, the beliefs we hold and how we act based on age are not warranted.

Limiting Beliefs on Age

Ageism is the ideas, attitudes, beliefs, and behaviors that are biased against persons or groups because of their older age.

Adult-centrism is exaggerate egocentrism of adults; the adult perspective is inherently right or better. So the opinions of those who are not adults or are young adults are not valued.

We live in an ageist and adult-centric society. If you want to test you implicit bias on ageism, check out the Harvard Implicit Association Test. Find out if you associate old with strong or feeble. If you want to know how adult-centric you are, ask someone in your household under 25 years old.

Here are some terms to avoid when describing young and older adults:

Kid

New kid

Whipper Snappers

Wet behind the ears

Baby accountants, Baby accountants, Baby….

Oldster

Retirement

Over the hill

Geezer

Bag lady

Silver tsunami

Senior moment

We say that age is nothing but a number. Bu if we ignore or devalue someone’s opinion because of age, make assumptions about a person’s capabilities or knowledge based on age, we are condemning and judging a person because of their age. Even when we are well intentioned, we can still be hurtful. Isn’t time for us to check our blindspot and question our beliefs, assumptions, and actions?

Let’s rethink the kids table this year and consider having sweet potato and pumpkin pie. There can never be too much pie.

Let’s get pie.

An Idea to Still Create The Life You Want for 2019

At the start of 2019, what promises did you make to yourself?

What life did you plan on creating?

Were you going to change your health, wealth, or career?

How well did you do?

Was is unbelievably easy? If so, Congratulations! And share some pointers.

Or did the motivation wane and something knock you off your square?

I didn’t reach all my goals. Nutrition and health have been my on and off 2019 roller coaster ride. Wrong food choices, no exercise, late night snack—all of these derailed me. I know better but that’s not the same as doing better. If you are like me and fell short on some 2019 goals or resolutions, before you smack yourself —remember today is a new day. There are 51 days to lay a foundation and a pathway to our goals and resolutions before the year ends.

It’s not too late to create the life we want for 2019. Let’s S.M.A.C. and hack ourselves instead.

A S.M.A.C. is a small, specific, measurable, attainable, consistent activity that brings your actions and your word into alignment. Your repeated actions —S.M.A.C.s—move you forward to your 2019 goals and resolution. S.M.A.C.s mean you are in action of doing better with a mindset of being better.

So for the next 50 days, immerse yourself in small things to be and do better: affirmations, visioning, experiential artist dates, prayer and faith based exercises, professional coaching, training, journaling, professional therapy, growth-mind set exercising, small atomic habit practices, yoga, meditation, behavior and diet detox, 30 day challenges, accountability partners . . .

Select a strategy that allows you start where you are right now stress-free. Design a small, specific, measurable, attainable, consistent activity fits your need, and your style and willingness right now. Block out the time on your calendar for your mind set and activity.

Last month I accepted 30 day clean eating challenge, I walked away may be 15.9 ounces lighter, but I eliminated caffeine and started taking my daily vitamins. These are small wins and I’m getting closer to my goal if being and living heathy. This month I re-upped my monthly yoga subscription and my sauna visits. I plan to make my way to the studio or sauna at least once weekly.

What makes the S.M.A.C.s effectiveness is designing my own life hacks. Life hacks are strategies adopted in order to manage one’s time and daily activities in more efficient and easy ways.

I stash vitamins in my purse, car, and desk eliminating any excuse not to take them. My yoga mat and clothes are in the car and I have a 7pm class. With that handled, I can continue to enjoy staying at work a little later by myself, not fight the evening traffic to make a 6 o’clock class, and stop on my way home.

Well designed life hacks also increased benefits. Yoga and saunas naturally increase your desire to drink water. Because of the time of my yoga class and the relaxed state of mind when I leave, a simple salad or soup meal works. In the sauna, I can even create my blogs.

Don’t Forget The Rewards.

A well designed hack also has rewards. We love gold stars for a job well done. Small, immediate, personalized rewards will give you motivation and gratification. The reward must not undermine or detract from your good work. A bag of large chips after each workout is not a good reward for those pursuing health and nutrition. My go to rewards are socks and books.

So now you have an idea of how to still create the life you wanted for 2019. How about it? We are living the 314th day of 2019. How will you S.M.A.C. and hack and create the life you want?

My books for keeping my commitments to myself

Talk to Yourself

If you are stuck and not achieving your 2019 goals ask yourself: “Is the Ego or Intuition driving my internal dialogue?”

The neuroscience shows the Ego drives most of human dialogue as we are wired for survival.  Survival means keeping us safe and sound.  And that’s it —a base existence.

Survival is like having a black and white television and having to move the antenna around to even get a clear picture.

If you have a black white picture, I bet you are yearning for a colored, high definition one. I bet there is even an urge to not just watch beautiful colors but to experience them first-hand.

For me, reading about and seeing the Eiffel tour and the Fearless Girl statute just weren’t enough.  I needed to touch and feel them.  So, I did.

The secret to success was to switch my internal dialogue.

How to talk to yourself:

📌Thank the Ego.

Thank the Ego for making sure you have gotten to today safe and sound.

📌Inform the Ego.

Let you Ego know that you need the other partner Intuition to take the lead.

📌Assure the Ego.

Intuition respects the work Ego has done, will preserve it and build upon it.  The Ego can then let go and let the Intuition get in the driver’s seat.

Now shift your focus, and ask and answer the questions from your Intuition.   Let’s make it easy and just ask yourself: “What goal matters most to me?  What would I do to achieve it if I knew I could not fail?  What will be the impact on me and others when I achieve this goal?”

📌Commit to finishing at least one outstanding 2019 goal.

📌Then take one action that aligns with your answer. Then another.   Repeat each day, finding and completing 1-3 tasks.

📌Be Deliberate and Intentional.  Be enthusiastic.

When enthusiasm wanes, ask your intuition questions again and  just keep your commitment, your word, your promise.  Complete your daily tasks.

There are 94 days left this year.  You still have time to hone in, focus, and achieve 2019 goals.

Be bold and post your responses in the comments.  My 2019 goal is to inspire people to live their lives fully.  Post your goal and I will cheer you on to success.  Encouragement is free!

I look forward to hearing from you and celebrating your success!

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Back In Session

School is back in session, and I am back from my blog break. My focus for next 12 months: I will share a monthly blog, I will continue to share the space with guest bloggers, and I will continue to seek ways to make a positive impact in my areas—leadership and administration.

Welcome back and please share this blog with your friends and colleagues and see the other ways to connect for leadership inspiration.

This week I have the honor of speaking to a class of college students preparing for internship. We will discuss multigenerational work environments, workplace rules on dress code and social media, and life balance. One of the key take-a-ways for the students is the tips for workplace success and it is applicable to all ages and all stages. Take a look!

7 Tips for Being Successful In the Workplace

1 Build positive relationships and communities. Find mentors and sponsors. Attend professional development.

2 Be authentic.

3 Be Inclusive. See YouTube video “Inclusion Begins with ‘I’ as a reminder.”

4 Be respectful of the work rules and discuss relevant change.

5 Resolve Conflicts. Have the difficult conversations. Share your facts, tell your story, ask an open ended question, and listen for the other perspective. Resources: Mediation training, Vital Smarts Crucial Conversation training and tools, and Restorative Practice training.

6 Be prepared and on time.

7 Practice Self-care and Life balance. Schedule 1 hr weekly and something big at least annually. Practice Ideas: Vision Board, bullet journaling, and Artist Dates.

As a bonus, I also suggest the following good books.

Top Books for Work and Life Success

Essentialism by Greg Mckeown and Choice Theory by Dr. William Glasser as people, especially busy attorneys, search for life balance.

How Women Rise by Sally Helgesen and The Effective Executive by Peter Drucker, and the Little Black Book of Success by Elaine Brown, Rhonda McClean and Marsha Haygood for leaders who are interested in their success as well as the success of other leaders.

So what are your thoughts on these materials? And, how was your summer?

Coach2Zen is the

Inspiring Minds’ blog. Readers may post comments and like us on FaceBook @allInspiringminds and @Coach2Zen.com.

Summer Break

I loved when school was officially closed for the summer.  The Summer Break was time to not think about academic but to concentrate on fun.  Most of it was unstructured and could begin after the household chores were complete.

I declared a summer break of that proportion to the degree possible from July 12, 2019.  So, there will be work but I will leave before the sunsets and enjoy the evenings and weekends.  Vacations, birthday cookouts, and painting.  I will find my way to some conferences so work even has more relaxed approach.  I will be on break from blogging but will collect memories and notes so I’m fresh for the fall.

I hope you too take a long stretch during the summer.  Prioritize downtime and creativity.  This is a season to to soak in rays, and share a glass of lemonade with neighbors and friends.  Cheers to summer and see you again in fall.

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Downtown in Summertime